Fair and Balanced

Because the recent politician personal scandals were not bipartisan enough, Fox News stepped in to save America. (Fox News puts the “partisan” in “bi-partisan”?)
Thank you, wise and respectful media. What would we ever do if we were left with nothing but DFH bloggers?
Now; can we please focus on the relevant stuff (a State had effectively [...]

Observaciones sobre el juego Mexico-El Salvador

[Apologies to my gringo friends. I will try to translate this later]
Algunos pensamientos al medio tiempo:

Porque demonios siguen convocando a Arce? Ese guey no trae nada, lo que se dice nada. No dribla, no tiene tiro, corre pero nada fuera de lo normal. Me imagino que simplemente no hay volantes por derecha en el Futbol [...]

On the virtues of Socialist* Public Transport and urban living

When was the last time you saw something like this during your hour-long commute on some traffic-ridden interstate?

*The fact that this was done on behalf of capitalist pigs promoting some opium-of-the-masses TV Show does not make it any less Communistical, natch. They speak dutch over there, for effessem’s sake!

Seriously, Catholic Church

Why must you insist on make me foam at the mouth (because clearly, all actions taken by people everywhere are done solely to gain a reaction from me) with indefensible shit your people spout? I mean, I don’t hate you. I know you do good things. I know lots of really incredible people belong and [...]

Goddamnit, people!

See, this is the kind of shit that makes me suspicious of people who “love animals.” (Yes, I’m generalizing, I know you happen to have genuine affection for your pets and would never do anything to harm them or objectify them or anything like that). Animals are not a)Surrogate children, b)MOTHERFUCKING TOYS.
When I’m Supreme Soviet [...]

I feel like I’m taking crazy pills!

What the hell is up with all the pro-Carla people lately? Seriously? I mean, seriously? I get it, she’s cooky and probably entertaining to some (I have to keep reminding myself that hurling a book at my LCD TV would make me want to hang myself every time she goes on about how she “puts [...]

Liberal Media!

Sweet FSM, this is beyond retardiculous (retardedly ridiculous -and- ridiculously retarded. I got the trademark on the word, don’t try nothin’ funny). There is a news article on CNN dated Two-Thousand fuckin’ Nine, Anno Domini, whose title is, and I promise you I’m not making this shit up, Should your wife have guy-friends?*.
At first glance, [...]

I’m freakin’ tired of seeing this crap.

PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT:
Patriotism is not a synonym for Jingoism, nor Xenophobia. Thank you.

Bring out the On Notice board, Jimmy!

Some are self-explanatory, some may require a little context. Just in case:

Micro Black Holes at Cern’s LHC: Scientist say they are absolutely no problem at all. Paranoid tinfoil hat people with zero background on physics go apocalyptic. I can’t trust scientists, they’re too facty.
Communist Panda Bears: I had heard somewhere that Pandas weren’t actually bears. [...]

D-bag of the day.

The affluent Beverly Farms conceited Massholes who used a 4th of July Parade to make fun of the (working class) Gloucester High pregnant girls. They really went out of their way to make it as degrading as possible.
Nevermind that teen pregnancies on their town are about the same as in Gloucester! Pretty embarassing that it’s [...]